Still untitled. Wrote this down on the spot.

I care and I miss you, so much. I wish the things were the same, like before.

Now you would not talk to me anymore. 

I know, times have changed. 

Things have gotten worse. But some things have gotten better. 

I hope you feel better now. 

Even though that I could not resist of looking at your photos, I know this separation will make you better, and after a long time, months of separation, I still feel the same. 

The feelings towards you haven’t changed. 

I have been meeting other people.  People, who are completely different from you. 

I know you are meeting others too.  Others, who are much better than me. 

But everyday, I have been thinking, that I would rather spend the time with you. 

And everyday, my feelings got worse. Worse, in the sense that I experience pain even though I know you are doing fine.  Even though..

Even though, I know that everything will be fine and everyone’s been moving on and so did you and so did..

 

I know.  I should stop all this drama.  I should stop this drama!

The pain lingers on if I am the only one who does the drama. 

Drama.  Drama!! 

I am hurting because I keep on doing this. 

I know.  Sounds weird. 

You told to stop loving you, because it would hurt so much.   And it does.  It still does. 

But I can’t stop loving you.   I can’t.  I tried, but nothing seems to work out.  Nothing. 

I played along, with others, hoping that this would carry the pain and misery away, but it didn’t. 

It just didn’t. 

And now, I am still sticking to what I did say, I will be here no matter what.  I’ll be staying, even though you don’t want me anymore. 

This is the only way to cope up. 

I can’t be just any man’s comfort. 

I am not like them.  I am not like her. 

 

This is the only way I can do. 

The only way is not to fight the feeling, but to get along with it. 

I need you to help me to get through with this.

All I can say is, I love you.  I care.  I miss you so much.

 

 

 

 

Published by: nuthin2say

This is the blog of a person who has been won, defeated, won again.. Because life is just like that. Jamie, aka nuthin2say, is a pseudonym. She can be found in other places in the internet, using the online name jhamiefloatie. Her thoughts spewed words that created this blog. This contained her frustrations and victories towards her journey through life. This blog was born circa 2008. Most of the posts are from her teenage years.

Categories My Expressions1 Comment

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