This should be my line. :))

Yes! I am LAZY! But I’m the LAZIEST BUM in the whole world!”

[whatever. ;)]

Love through the old files

052409-2220.  I just went through my old files and found out one of our conversations just before he met her.  And I don’t know how I felt after.  Those were the days. We were okay, then.  We talked a lot.  Before, we can talk, and still smile and laugh, and it was as if nothing happened.  It was as if nothing broken.  I can say that we really accepted US being friends.  And it felt that we have the urges to talk to each other after everything that has happened.  It felt that there will still be tomorrow, and we just have to wait.  It felt that the thing we have on each other never faded.

That was before.

Everything ended after he met her.  I guess I was left behind.  He moved on that easily.  And I had to, too.  She was always there.  She’s just couple of kilometers from where he is.  I was never near him.  And I guess that was the reason why he forgot me that easily.

I already moved on.  I also got my own.    But after reading our converation, I was thinking that what we had on us was wasted.  We should have developed it, but instead we didn’t.  Everything’s over now. We seldom communicate.  And there’s a feeling of hostility now everytime I talk to him.  And I know deep inside him, he was to get me out of the picture.  NEVER TO BOTHER HIM AGAIN.  I know it.  I can feel it. And she tells me that.

I don’t know why I’m feeling distraught. All I’m asking is to be friends.  I’m not asking him to give back his life to me again.  That’s shit.

Okay, we can pretend that we never met. But please do me a favor.  Don’t lose her.  Thank you very much.

I still love you but it’s just one of those things..

Give me a minute
I need a second
Got to breathe there
It’s Just one of those things

wish I could tell you
How much I need you
And how much you
need me to go

Please don’t listen
to what I’m gonna tell you
Look in my eyes and know
I simply had to give up
But I didn’t let go without struggle
you know, I still love you
It’s just, just one of those things

I know I made it seem
Like all was written down
And I hid all my pain
And now I bring it out

And you’ll be scared at first
cuz it’s such an ugly blow
I don’t know which is worse
to learn or not to know

Please don’t listen
to what I’m gonna tell you
Look in my eyes and know
I simply had to give up
But I didn’t let go without struggle
you know, I still love you
It’s just, just one of those things

Please don’t listen
to what I’m gonna tell you
Look in my eyes and know
I simply had to give up
But I didn’t let go without struggle
you know, I still love you
It’s just, it’s just one of those things

I tried to tell you a million times
That you have always been one of us
I tried to tell you a million times
You have always been one of us

Please don’t listen
(I tried to tell you a million times
That you have always been one of us)
Please don’t listen
(I tried to tell you a million times
That you have always been one of us)
Please don’t listen….
Just One of Those Things – Meg and Dia

He is. I am.

He is life and I am soul.
He is the wind. I am the blow.
He is the sun. I am the moon.
if he is the moon, then I am the stars.
He is the Light.  I am the shadow.
He is the glade.  I am the meadow.
He is the question. I am the reason..
If he is the gift, then I am his ribbon.
He is the sword.  I am the shield.
He is the Great Wall.  I am its build.
If I am the carpet, he is the floor;
Then we will be the WELCOME at your door.
If he’s not, I’ll sat no.
If it’s yes, then I’ll say so.
If he is the groom and I am the bride,
Then forever, we’ll be side-by-side.

Nothing

Ball of light
Struck by lightning
Quench your thirst
It must be something

Tears of joy
Sweating palms
Kiss the cheeks
There must be really something

Gray turned into color
Love can make you see it all
It make sense into the nonsense
From nothing into something.

It wasn’t even the start..

When I met him, it wasn’t the start. I wasn’t even looking at his eyes.  I never thought he’d the guy who would give me the butterflies.  The second time was sweeter, and after that, we went on knowing each other.  Then I started looking at things the other way around.  I realized that in him, love can be found..

In him. In his arms. In between our sweaty palms. I found. Life.

Night gaze…

 It was like a patch of dreams
I slowly stare
Across the moonlit flare
I sat down, to watch by the curtains, open wide
I sat down, to watch the twinkling still
Just beside the window sill
This dark night is the darkest
I’m amazed at its fullest!
O dark night…
Against all the city lights
You are my very sight.

Weapon

My sword
My shield
My most valued possesion
Its ink is my blood
Flowing through paper
My voice. My wit,
Drawn precisely on that sheet.
I have no fear whenever it is with me
It’s powerful than you could ever foresee
This weapon is always with me
Bought at SM City.

Goodbye

Down
I cast a shadow
I cast it low.

Over
The bridge of uncertainty
I crossed it far.

Under
Your chin I lay
Discomforted by doubts.

I need to let go.
Let go.
Breathe. And take the air in.

Farewell
I guess this is it
Goodbye.

Broken-hearted

Not moving on..
Stuck in this hole of misery
Hiding where the light doesn’t shine
   Afraid of moving forward
   Afraid of taking risks
   Afraid of getting hurt all over again

The past is still haunting me
   Following me in my dreams
   Following my path
   Following like a dark shadow

Losing parts of myself
And stranded to be broken
   Stranded in this hole of misery
   Stranded in this rain of fire

I am sick
   Sick of pretending
   Sick of being hurt
      over and over and over again
   Sick of playing the game we lose

I lose.
I lose myself
I lose my old self
And beginning a new me

Tired of waiting
Tired of hoping
Tired of being stuck in this hole of misery
And I’m moving forward
   Because I have to.
   We have to.
   Even I don’t want to.